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25 November 2010

Eskimo Winter

The eskimo chief suddenly died and his harward educated son was forced to become the new chief of eskimos.
Winter was fast approaching. The late chief had a way of looking at the sky and stars and calculating and predicting the severity of winter.
The eskimos approached the new chief and asked him if the oncoming winter is going to be severe. If it is expected to be severe, they have to start piling up wood.
The new chief, not being aware of his father's way of predicting the severity of winter, did not want to take any chances and asked his people to pile up some wood.
15 days passed. Still it did not seem as if the winter was going to be severe. The eskimo people again approached the chief.
"O Chief, we have piled up enough wood for a normal winter. Currently it doesn't look as if the winter is going to be severe. Should we continue piling up wood? Will the winter be severe?"
The chief called up the Met department and asked if the coming winter is going to be severe.
"Looks like the winter will be severe" answered the met department.
The chief asked his people to pile up more wood.
Another 15 days passed. Still there was no signs of a severe winter. The eskimos again came to the chief.
"Chief, will the winter be severe this time? Looking at the current weather, it doesn't look as if the winter will be severe. We have piled up so much wood that we do not even have space to pile more wood. Can you pl. tell us if we should pile up more wood?"
The chief again called the met department.
"Will this winter be severe?" he asked the met department, "It doesn't look as if it will be"
"Definitely. This winter is going to be the severest in a long time" responded the guy at the met deptt.
"How do you know?" the chief asked, 'How are you so sure?"
"The eskimos are piling up wood like crazy. Whenever they do that it portends a severe winter" answered the met rep.

19 November 2010

The Optometrist or the Optimist....

I had to get my spectacles mended.
"I should see an Optimist" I told my wife
"To get your specs mended you need to meet an Optometrist" replied my wife.
I cheked up 'Optometrist' in the dictionary.
'Optometrist' appeared after 'Ophthalmologist' and 'Optician' in the dictionary.
"May be I need to see an 'Ophthalmologist' or an 'Optician'?" I was not sure.
"No, you should see an Optometrist", my wife averred.
She was so sure that I called up the number of Optometrist.
"How much time will you take to mend my specs?" I asked the lady who responded.
"Two hours.... may be less...I am an optimist" she responded

Sherlock holmes and watson in a tent

Sherlock Holmes and Dr.Watson are camping out at night. Both of them have laid a tent and goes to sleep at night.
Sometime around midnight, Holmes wakes up Watson....
"Watson, wake up and look up. What do you see?" asked Holmes.
"I see a bright sky littered with twinkling stars and with moon in the background" replied Watson.
"What does that tell you?" Asked Holmes
Watson pondered this question for a moment. "It reminds me of the beauty of the nature and tells me that god is the ultimate artist. The site of the brilliant sky makes me in awe of the vastness of the universe and makes me realize that in the universal scheme of things, we are just a very minute and miniscule participants. All those stars and the sky and the earth and us are so perfectly balanced that I salute the greatest artist and craftman who is god......" Watson completed an ecstatic and enthused narration...
Holmes was silent.
"Holmes, what does the site of the clear sky and stars tell you?" asked Watson.
"Watson, you fool", replied an exasperated Holmes "someone has stolen our tent"